A Gutsy Girl

You will heal. I will help.

faith

Healing vs Wholeness

Filed Under: Faith, Gut Healing, IBS IBD, Inspire, Love, Wellness Tagged With: , , , , ,

My whole life (at least the part when I’ve been sick), I have talked about gut healing. I never once thought about healing vs wholeness…..until Friday night.

Healing vs wholeness is where this whole conversation is going to begin. It’s sort of a deep one, and if you’ll hang in here with me for a couple/few weeks, I’m going to talk about all of it.

It starts here, and the foundation was biblical, but the application is for everyone.

On Friday night I heard Terri Savelle Foy speak, and it was life changing for me. I was shaking my head “yes” to all the things, but probably not in the ways most people were. 

The night rooted when she asked,

Do you believe that healing and wholeness are different?

I wasn’t sure, until she explained it via the story from the Bible about the 10 lepers that Jesus healed.

10 Lepers

Healing vs Wholeness www.sarahkayhoffman.com bible coffee

10 lepers wanted to be made clean from their disease. Jesus responds to them by physically healing them. 

Of the 10, only one, the Samaritan, turns back to praise God and, “fell before his feet” to thank Jesus. Jesus asks rhetorically, “Were not 10 made clean? But the other nine, where are they? Was none of them to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?”

Jesus then addresses the healed Samaritan:

Get up and go on your way; your faith has made you well . (Luke 17:19)

Now, truth be told, the Bible doesn’t say (verbatim) that the 10th was made whole. I think Terri extracted that from the message because he was the only one to say thanks and give gratitude for the blessing. Perhaps she equated “well” with whole vs. simply just healed.

Regardless, Terri said that nine were healed (the leprosy went away), but only one was made whole (the leprosy went away and the missing body parts from the disease actually came back to form a whole person again). 

I could not stop thinking about it. I laid in bed and thought about it that night, and I told Ryan all about it the next day when he got home.

Healing vs Wholeness

My entire blog and even, heck, my entire life, has been built around healing – for myself and teaching other women to do the same.

I have a 286-page book called, The Gutsy Girl’s Bible: an approach to healing the gut.

Part of my mission is to help women worldwide heal with food and lifestyle vs drugs and medication.

Healing, healing, healing. The word means to become sound or healthy again. 

But whole…..whole means all of; entire, in an unbroken or undamaged state; in one piece.

The way Terri described the difference is very simple: Healing will make you well; disease (or problem) will stop, but only wholeness will allow you to move forward, fully repair, and rebuild.

I’ve been thinking about and praying hard on this.

What if I’ve been wrong all along? What if healing and wholeness are truly different? What if the reason we all struggle to heal indefinitely is because of a/the missing link?

Healing vs Wholeness www.sarahkayhoffman.com writing blogger computer

For the nine lepers it was their lack of gratitude and thankfulness.

Is that our missing link? Is that my missing link? And if not, what is?

It seems like we heal, then relapse, heal then relapse…..everyone, over and over and over again. For you, maybe it’s not your gut, maybe it’s something else – some other area of your life, but you heal, then relapse, heal then relapse.

I don’t care who you are or what your status might currently be. If you dig deep, I’m guessing you’ll find yourself wedged in the scenario somewhere.

I started peeling back the layers immediately because I truly believe I have not yet been made whole because of my own missing link. Of course I still believe that there is an underlying condition that is the SIBO bottleneck, but why have we still not found it (when I have been searching so hard) and what caused the trigger this time (after staying in remission for so long)? 

Through Terri, I heard very clearly on Friday night that in order to address this and a whole host of other things, I need to,

Clean Up and Clean Out 

Leaving that thought here for the day, and I’ll be back for more soon.

Xox,
SKH

Compared To

Filed Under: Faith, Inspire, Love Tagged With: , , ,

On Monday, I sent an email to our old Pastor in California. The subject line was, “Compared to.”

In my email, I told him about the church we attended on Easter Sunday.

I described for him how I’ve been comparing churches to Southwinds, but that everything has come up short. And then, I wrote, “my mom told me I would not be able to compare, as there is nothing in this small town like what we had at Southwinds.” (By the way, that’s not a bad thing. Bad and different are not the same things.)

But I didn’t exactly write to him to complain. 

Instead, I waited to write to him until I felt I had that moment in church like the hundreds of moments I had at Southwinds.

Compared To

Do you want to know the truth? I have gone to church just three times since we moved back to Minnesota. Once was on Christmas Eve with my dad (at the Catholic church), the next was two weekends ago at another local church, and the third was last weekend for the Easter service.

Yes, qualifying me as “that Christian” who goes for the holiday only.

Only it’s not. 

I have been so afraid of what we would (or wouldn’t) find at a church here because, well again, compared to Southwinds back in California I didn’t think that anything would even vaguely compare. 

I was re-baptized at Southwinds in California very intentionally….because I loved that church so hard. I was literally excited every single Sunday because the church, the people, the Pastors, and the message were there for me when I hit near bottom, as I climbed on out, and everything in between. It was a come-as-you-are church. And the music was incredible! 

But this past Sunday, Ryan and I decided to venture out a little. We decided to try a church about 20 minutes from where we live and that (from the looks of it online) had a very similar feel and vibe to that of Southwinds.

Compared To www.sarahkayhoffman.com church God Jesus

From the moment we walked in, it felt like everything we were used to back in California.

We got the kids situated at kid care, and then we sat down, just in time for the band to start.

It was a different service, given that it was Easter and they had about 30 minutes of straight music, but for me, that day, it was exactly what I needed. 

I wrote to our old Pastor saying,

As the band played and sang “Resurrecting,” I had tears. I found myself taking this huge sigh of relief because I finally was in a place that made me feel the way Southwinds did and I was able to receive the message and God’s presence more than ever, which I’ve been desperate for during this journey with my dad’s cancer.

The message was fairly short that day, and I’m hoping they aren’t always that way, but it left me thinking to myself, “I can’t wait for church next Sunday.”

I have only ever been in one church where I really felt out of place. Rarely will you find a church that isn’t filled with incredible people and a positive message.

It bothered me that I couldn’t just settle on a church back here in Minnesota. I’ve grappled with the whole idea that “church isn’t about me.” I wanted to just go wherever was most convenient because it is supposed to be about simply praising the Lord. But in the end, Ryan and I couldn’t go to just go, and do the motions of church life because it was something we felt we had to do. 

We were looking for a place that would have us constantly seeking that strong desire to learn and know the Lord more because that is the point, not the motions to simply show up. 

There is nothing compared to Southwinds, but I am so grateful for what happened on Sunday. On that day, over 3 months since attending a Southwinds service, I was finally present and excited for all that might come at a new church home.

p.s. I still am (likely always will) following the Southwinds messages online. You can, too. They are all HERE.

Xox,
SKH

Let There Be Light

Filed Under: 101 Days of Blogging, Faith, Inspire, Love, Wellness Tagged With: , , , ,

It was only three days before I boarded that plane back to Minnesota this past December when Patsy’s, ‘Let There Be Light,’ popped up on my Facebook feed.

By then, Patsy Clairmont was already my spirit animal, but that day solidified it.

On Tuesday my dad started the IV (and main) portion of his chemo treatments. After being hospitalized even prior to starting treatment they decided to ease into the chemo treatment plan. The first round he was only at 60% full dosage of the pill portion. He did that for three weeks, and this past Tuesday, he started 100% dosage of the IV chemo portion while maintaining at 60% of the pill. 

Next cycle (in three weeks), he will be at 100% on all.

The first three weeks with only 60% pill, he was, for the most part, taking it very well. His weight wasn’t falling more, he was out driving his truck a couple times, and he was able to enjoy time with his brother (who came from Texas) and sister + her husband (who came from California). 

I mean, they even went to Diamond Joe’s one day. (Those of you not from around here, it’s a Casino on the Minnesota/Iowa border.)  Let There Be Light sarahkayhoffman.com Jerry Patsy Jack Joe Dad Mom Diamond Joe

On the whole, up until this point, we can’t complain a ton about the treatment and how dad has been doing.

100% dose of IV? Now, this is going to be another story. I feel like I’m on pins and needles each morning when I text my mom, “How is dad? How was his night?” (Note: I’ve had to text because while I was sick there was no way I was going out to see him.)

If you’ve ever watched someone go through Cancer (or have yourself), you know that at some point it gets hard – really hard.

We are likely entering that stage now.

And here’s the thing – this stage was my worst fear when I got the news about my dad back in November. I have never wanted to see my dad in any light other than the one I’ve always seen him in – strong, hard-working, and active. I certainly never wanted to see it so soon.

Let There Be Light

December 17, 2017, this video from Patsy popped up in my feed (I learned yesterday when I pulled it from YouTube that it is not, in fact, new though.) It’s over 8 minutes long, and you might not want to watch it, but let me tell you – Patsy is a little spitfire with class and soul, and storytelling capabilities I could only wish to have. The video has over 2.8 million views and it has been shared on Facebook over 7,800 times.

If you have the time, watch it. You won’t regret it.


So I sat there that night, right on my Facebook feed and listened. Honestly, I had no idea that the video was about Cancer. The caption is, “Because it’s a favorite of many of you…” I only watched it because I was needing some light in my life – about the move, my dad, all of it.

{Spoiler alert: Patsy is a God-fearing, Bible-loving woman. This video and message is faith-based. If that’s not your jam, you might not care about this message at all. It is my jam, so that’s why I had to share it.}

The video is all about Patsy’s friend, Carol, who was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. The Cancer then spread to many other areas within in her body, and during that time, Patsy wanted to find the words to say to her friend Carol. She wanted the right words but had no clue what those were. 

She then found herself at Genesis 1:3 in the Bible,

And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.

Patsy wasn’t sure of those words (because they are so basic), but she called her friend, Carol, on the phone to tell them to her, anyway.

After they hung up the phone, Carol just started saying, “Let there be light,” over-and-over again.

What happened next was incredible! Those 4 words became clear as day (you’ll hear it in the video).

As Patsy closes, she says,

There’s so much we don’t know. Carol knew she was not healed, but God gave her exactly what she needed at the moment she needed it.

Of all the many things Patsy said during the video, it was those two sentences I held on to.

Back in November and in December, and then January, and now in February, there is so much we still don’t know about my dad’s Cancer, what the implications will be, and how he is going to respond to the IV Chemo treatments.

This uncertainty has been emotionally draining for our entire family because nothing is worse than knowing the best could happen but also that the worst might lie ahead. 

When I think of change, in my own life, and in our family’s life, I do something that I know is helping during these days. 

It’s called BELIEVE.

Let There Be Light Healing SIBO for Good - Volume 3 sarahkayhoffman.com Believe

Like Patsy says and like Carol did, I believe that God will give my dad (and all of us) exactly what we need at the moment we need it. I believe that there is purpose and power in massive change. I believe that God will not turn his back on my dad or any of us for one moment (even when there is physical and emotional pain).

When a room is pitch black, even with the tiniest amount of light, that light will shine through, overcoming any and all darkness. And in that, in this, in all of it…..I too believe in the power of, let there be light.

p.s. I’m feeling about 100% so I’m going to see my dad this morning! 

p.s.s. If you or anyone you love has gone through Cancer and there are powerful Bible verses you’ve come back to, could you please share them in the comments below? Or email me them by clicking HERE. Thank you kindly.

Xox,
SKH

If you don’t have time to read these posts daily, but don’t want to miss them, be sure to follow via Bloglovin’ and/or join my personal e-newsletter HERE. I am doing my best to send a once per week email recap of prior week’s posts.

These posts will all live under “Wellness+Lifestyle” and also tagged with “101 Days of Blogging.” The 101-day series runs from Monday, January 8, 2018, through Wednesday, April 18, 2018.

If there is a topic surrounding change that you would love for me to include in this series, please just CONTACT ME.

Previous 101-Day Change Series Posts

  1. Beginnings are Scary
  2. Change Pain Point
  3. Making Sense of Change
  4. Gratitude Journal
  5. Love Your Baby Girl
  6. Little Things Add Up
  7. House and Home
  8. Sunday Reflections
  9. Two
  10. Chocolate Shake
  11. 3-Ingredient Chocolate Peanut Butter Banana Shake
  12. Chaos is a Temporary State
  13. Thirsty Thursday
  14. Month One
  15. The Nudge to Connect
  16. 11 Favorites from 11 Years in California
  17. One Box at a Time
  18. Good Enough is Enough
  19. There is No Dishwasher
  20. WWDW Number 8
  21. Move Initiated
  22. Sharing My Journey
  23. Back with the Tribe
  24. Small Town Grocery Shopping Part One
  25. January 2018 Catch Up Over Bone Broth
  26. Patsy Clairmont is My Spirit Animal

Giving Tuesday

Filed Under: Faith, Inspire, Love, Mompreneur Tagged With: , , ,

Giving Tuesday kicks off a month filled with giving and surprises. Last year around this date, I said to Ceci, “Hey, tonight after school, let’s get the kids in the car, and drive around town to find someone (or people) to help.” She was excited by the idea, and that night we drove and drove and drove, but came up short. We hung onto the cash, and throughout the next month, whenever we felt like someone needed something or we wanted to create a smile on someone’s face, we’d do so. It was straight awesome, and it will be replicated every single year now.

Starting today.

Giving Tuesday is a global movement that is fueled by the power of social media and collaboration. According to their website,

Celebrated on the Tuesday following Thanksgiving (in the U.S.) and the widely recognized shopping events Black Friday and Cyber Monday, #GivingTuesday kicks off the charitable season, when many focus on their holiday and end-of-year giving.

This is the time of year when there is a day for everything starting on Black Friday. After that comes Small Business Saturday, then Cyber Monday, and finally Giving Tuesday.

Of course, I did the online shopping on Black Friday (Beautycounter + an 8 quart Instant Pot, anyone?!).

And then, I shopped small on Saturday (got some groceries at The Daily Grind in my hometown – organic breakfast chicken sausage, gluten-free oats, and raw cheese).

Yesterday I dug in hardcore for Cyber Monday, sharing this list of my favorite 12 items and buying a Kindle for my dad, a backup memory card, Bullet Journal for 2018, a book, and several things for the kids from the children’s holiday list.

I sent a Black Friday e-newsletter and talked about all the Cyber Monday stuff via various social networks.

I am a small business, and it would have probably been very “business-like” of me to talk about my business, what I do, who I help, and how people can support by working with me if they so desired for Small Business Saturday.

But I didn’t. Not this year.

Because I wanted to save it all for Giving Tuesday.

Giving Tuesday

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Giving Tuesday sarahkayhoffman.com Winston Churchill quote quotes give

My greatest joys through building my business have been that through the building of it, I am able to give – around the holidays and all year long. 

For 17.5 million reasons, this holiday season is going to have me on a super emotional rollercoaster.

Giving to the foster children of San Joaquin county one last time is a huge part of this.

I’m speaking at the foster care holiday party on “continuing through difficult times.” 

Shortly after that, I’ll deliver items to help make a foster child’s Christmas brighter. (Reminder: deadline is Wednesday, December 13.)

Foster Children Christmas sarahkayhoffman.com

And then? The week of December 18th I’ll give one final check for whatever might be needed. 

But this Giving Tuesday isn’t about supporting my business or even about supporting foster children (if it’s really not your thing).

This post is the idea that you should give – to whomever you feel compelled to give to, in whatever ways you feel called to do so. 

It’s not even necessarily about money if that’s not in your cards.

But give, give however you can – time or money, even a basic smile. 

So many people spend the holiday season alone, sad, or unhappy. It’s a reminder for all they don’t have instead of one big season filled with hot chocolate, songs, events, and decorating.

The Giving Tuesday movement gives these ideas for how you, as an individual can give:

  1. Give your voice. There are many ways you can donate your time to organizations in your community. Search for nonprofits in your neighborhood and email them to see how you can help.
  2. Share your #MyGivingStory.
  3. Give time – Volunteer! Search for nonprofits in your neighborhood and email them to see how you can help.
  4. Give Great! Be an informed giver on #GivingTuesday and throughout the year! Visit our Great Giving resource page or check out these materials from the Laura Arrillaga-Andreessen Foundation to elevate your giving from having momentary meaning to becoming monumentally meaningful. 
  5. Give back. Donate to a charity or organization that has impacted your life. Remember to share that you gave and encourage your family and friends to join you in giving back on #GivingTuesday. (pssst…..this is where I fall under. The foster care system wholly transformed my life.)
  6. Give pro bono. Use your skills to help nonprofits with their campaigns. You can search for pro bono opportunities on Taproot+ or reach out to you local nonprofits to see how you can use your talents to good. 
  7. Be #UNSelfie. Share how you are giving back on #GivingTuesday by posting your #UNselfie on your social media.
  8. Give part of your paycheck. Payroll giving is becoming more and more popular at both companies and nonprofits. Donate a part of your paycheck to charity or talk to your management how your organization can make giving back part of its official policy.

Giving Tuesday kicks off this wonderful time of year for me when, even though I might not feel like giving a smile 100% of the time, I am giving all that I can. 

And I really, truly hope you will consider doing the same.

Xox,
SKH

Favorite Adoption Faith Book for Children

Filed Under: Adoption, Faith, Inspire, Love Tagged With: , , , , ,

Because we read it almost daily and have for many months now, I wanted to share our favorite adoption faith book for children.

It is the perfect mash-up of adoption meets faith, and while a book like this isn’t for everyone, it is absolutely for us and I wanted to share with you, in case you’ve been looking for an amazing new adoption faith book.

[Read more…] about Favorite Adoption Faith Book for Children

What the Lake Teaches

Filed Under: Faith, Inspire, Love Tagged With: , ,

I skipped over “On Disappointing People” (sorry!) in order to quickly get to the next chapter in Present Over Perfect, “What the Lake Teaches.”

Even though I have been done with the book for quite some time, I will continue to write on the chapters contained in it because I believe they are so valuable for me to revisit and because, if you have not already bought the book, perhaps it will give you the extra nudge to finally grab it.

But first, rumor has it that Shauna was Oprah’s SuperSoul Sunday this past Sunday. Just kidding. It’s not a rumor, it’s true. I didn’t actually get to watch it live (hello 11 am in the morning means a 1, 2, and 3-year-old obviously need 7 million things all at once), but I found it online, and now I can watch it whenever. So can you. Click HERE to watch. Can’t wait!

Onwards….

If you’ve been reading my blog lately, you know that all the sudden, this book has kind of helped spark a shift and change in my life for which I feel extremely grateful by. 

I believe that Shauna wrote this book for people like me. Those who would begin reading it and say, “Nah, this isn’t me.” But then, sooner rather than later realize, “Wowza. This is totally me.” Once I saw myself nearly in every single scenario she described, I was able to finish the book immediately.

I saw myself in so many scenes of what the lake teaches, and currently in some of the most excitingly yet bizarre ways (which eventually I’ll be able to share with you)! 

If you follow Shauna anywhere online you know how much she loves the lake. It’s her retreat, her safe place, and the one area where (I believe) she is able to just be and just let go. Through these lake experiences, she writes about the correlations between the lake and life. 

I underlined many sentences on almost every page of the chapter. It screamed to me in a gentle and brilliant way. 

But there was one thing that kind of stuck out and stayed engraved in my mind.

What the Lake Teaches

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What the Lake Teaches sarahkayhoffman.com Present Over Perfect Virtual Book Club

Shauna says,

Lake life has those invitations to rest and slowness woven right into the fabric of our days – rain showers that send us inside, nightfall that lays us down. But so many of us, myself chief among them, have forsaken those natural rhythms and stayed at full speed, through the night, through the storms. (p.62)

I felt like the chiefette among them, right along with Shauna.

Through every single night and all the storms, rarely have I backed off. In fact, when we first got Samarah, she didn’t sleep more than a couple hours for many months. Instead of keeping with the natural rhythm of early motherhood and sleeping when she slept and taking better care of myself to counteract all the chaos that was, I dug myself into a deeper hole. 

If Samarah woke up between 2-3 am (AM ladies, NOT PM), I would get up for the day. My mind told me, “She will be up and she will be demanding all day today, so if you want to get anything done, you better do it now.”

I would go downstairs, brew coffee, and get to work. 

Guys, 2-3 am – frequently!

This was anything but natural, and because it was so unnatural, I ended up getting extremely sick again. Shortly after, my Perioral Dermatitis reached its height and I was finally diagnosed with SIBO (and a whole host of other things).

It’s funny how as I reflected on this chapter and then on the decision I made at the half year mark to do less via my blog, I was taken back to something Shauna said earlier in the chapter,

A friend of mine told me I was pulling the ripcord on my career by being so outspoken about how badly I didn’t want to travel and speak anymore. Didn’t I realize the people who were asking me to speak might read my blog, and then not invite me? Exactly, I said. That’s the plan, I told him. I’m a writer, not a speaker, but I’ll never write another book again if I can’t get out of this constant cycle of output and exhaustion. (p.59)

I thought about this, too, on a much smaller level of course.

I have thought about writing, working, photographing, pro-bono-ing, all of it. The expectations from others that are there because I have always done it, because I always do it, and because everyone knows this about me – I have always stayed full speed through the night, through the storms.

But what if I didn’t anymore?

What if, instead of always doing the expected, I did the unexpected?

How would that impact some else’s life for me to heed what the lake the teaches?

Or maybe the question I really should be asking is, how would it affect Ryan, our children, and myself if I were to heed exactly the things the lake teaches?

Question: Did this chapter speak to you? Tell me how! Also, did you watch Shauna on Oprah? Thoughts?

Xox, 
SKH 

To Join

  1. Grab the book, “Present Over Perfect” at your local bookstore or on Amazon by clicking HERE (hardcover) or HERE (paperback). Spend this week just getting the book and perusing through it.
  2. Read the beginning of the book through Tunnels (which is what I’ll write about next time).
  3. Optional: Click HERE to let me know if you’re joining!
  4. If you have my blog in your feed, you’ll never miss one of these posts.
  5. If you follow my main Pinterest board, you’ll also never miss a post because I’ll always pin the latest post there.
  6. THESE newsletters will include blog posts about the book when I send them out (typically every week or every other week).
  7. This book will live under “Faith.” All books will be tagged with, “Virtual Book Club,” so you’ll be able to click that tag at the bottom of the post to revisit all past books, posts, and topics.