Happy birthday, Samarah!

Today you turn one.

One year ago today, at just 26 weeks and 4 days, you entered this big, big world.

On all accounts, your entrance into the world was anything but typical, and yet we know that God had plans for you and for your life.

We didn’t meet you until you were just 2 days shy of 2 months old.

We would give anything to have pictures of your very first breaths and all the little moments during those first 2 months of your life.

We don’t. And since daddy and I know that jet planes don’t have rear view mirrors, we thank God daily for each day he’s given us with you…..months 2-12.

I stared at you last night, just a little longer thinking just how much you’ve grown. From 2.5 pounds to 20+ pounds, you have grown into the sweetest little butterfly.

This is One.

Your giggle is priceless.

Your smile is infectious, so much so that every single place we go someone stops us to say,

She is the most beautiful baby I’ve ever seen.

Even your loud voice makes mama’s heart overflow with smiles. (Yesterday you started “growling,” and we have no idea where that came from, but can only hope it never fades!)

You don’t walk yet, but you’ve mastered crawling.

You love your dogs….the big Great Dane, Reagan, who barks at daddy when he throws you in the air and the little Peekepoo, Fiona who fights over the stuffed bear with you.

Your excitement is contagious, and your emotions all over the place let me know that God chose you perfectly for us.

You love the water and splash to no end in the pool.

You don’t really enjoy headbands, but since your hair is starting to get out of control, we put them in. And you look like an angel.

You’re not very good at sleeping – still – and it could be the death of us all, but these moments, too, they are fleeting fast and I’m not wishing time away any longer.

At just one, you’ve made your mama re-consider all the considerations for priorities I used to have. I think you’ve done the same to your daddy. There is no priority more important than you, sweet Sam.

Today you are one. 

We decided a big bash didn’t feel right.

Instead we chose to spend the day with you and with Granny Nana Jewison who came to visit (Grandma and Grandpa Hoffman spent last weekend graciously with us).

We are going to the zoo, and Grandma made you the sweetest Winnie the Poo cake.

We didn’t need anything fancy. We needed you to know how much you’re loved by us.

One year ago, at 8:40am, God sent us a baby angel. By His grace, you found us and we found you.

We love you more than a million a jars of peanut butter 🙂

Happy birthday, Samarah!

Love always,
Mama (and daddy)

p.s. Birthdays are a really big deal in our family, Sam, and it is my hope that it becomes one of your favorite holidays, too! A celebration of you….because you sure are worth it.

Sarah Kay Hoffman

You will heal. I will help.

childlike-sports.flywheelsites.com

Admit it: you clicked this post because you saw “9 months,” and a piece of you thought I’d have the ‘ole 9-month “news.”

I don’t. This is better.

Samarah turned 9-months old today.

When I realized it was the infamous 9-month mark, it took me back about a year when I was desperately waiting to tell you about a different kind of 9 months….yes, the kind where on that last day, a precious little baby enters the world.

I thought about how different my life is now that I am no longer concerned with “those” 9 months.

I thought about 9 months of celebrating life vs. waiting for a life to begin.

I thought about one pink line and about how thankful I was for never seeing two on that day.

I (even) thought about the idea that it just might be okay, that I am coming to truly accept the fact that my eggs are old and possibly not capable of ever making it to 9 months.

And she….little miss 9-month old Samarah Josephina is the reason.

Her 9-month old birthday reminds me that we cannot put a time frame on happiness. A beautiful outcome can happen at any given moment, when we least expect it.

She continues to grow and to thrive in ways that doctors and social workers can’t believe.

Someday when she’s old enough to read my blog and peruse all that her mama was saying, this is the short letter I hope she’ll love to see most from today, this her 9-month old entry….

Dear Samarah:

My final words from One Pink Line on February 3, 2012 stated:

Everything is beautiful in its time. Those little specs we saw on the ultrasounds were beautiful. But they were not ours to keep. I have to believe that everything happens for a reason, and that the day will come when the specs will turn to Beautiful Baby Hoffman. And when that day comes, I will look back on all of this and think, “Thank God for this one. I wouldn’t trade him/her for anything in the whole world.”

Everything did happen for a reason. And reason was ultimately not to have my own growing 9-month bump, but instead to have a several year bump in my heart waiting for you. Today, I sit here and write this and for the love of the Lord – yes, Samarah Josephina, yes – I do…..”Thank God for you. I wouldn’t trade you for anything in the whole world.” (And all of this goes for your daddy, too….you know your mama, though, always writing.)

You are the little apple of our eye. Your 9-month old heart has made ours complete.

We love you Josephine! (<– I wonder if we’ll still nickname her that by the time she reads this?!)

xo,
Mama and Daddy

Love your guts,
SKH

the trend to more
hollister hoodie Burberry Prorsum’s I Heart Classics show for Milan FW Menswear AW 2013

Sarah Kay Hoffman

You will heal. I will help.

childlike-sports.flywheelsites.com