Top 15 Things I Learned While in Minnesota

Today we are returning back home (er, kind of “home”) in California. By the time I hit “publish” on this post, I will be ready to hit the skies and leave what is actually home, Minnesota. During these past two weeks, I have had so many moments where I’ve just hit the pause button and been able to reflect. These are my top 15 things I learned while in Minnesota.

Top 15 Things I Learned While in Minnesota

1. Drop anything, no questions asked. We have spent the past 10 years seeking a network like this. And while it surfaces from time-to-time, it’s a mainstay in Minnesota.
2. Minnesota accent. I actually like the Minnesota accent, and I pick it up after only approximately 5 minutes of landing.
3. The weather. It’s not really that bad. Just kidding. I’m still not sold on the weather in Minnesota. While here this time, we had the most amazing weather, complete with beautiful days, thunder and rain, but nothing was extreme. That said, I have not forgotten about the freezing cold or awful humid days. 
4. The other state bird. Mosquitoes will never be my friend. They swarmed at my parent’s house, and I really despise them.
5. People read, and cheer us on. Google Analytics tell me that my blog continues to grow, but I had no idea just how many people in Minnesota (namely our hometown) read this blog and follow our journey. It made me wonder about the things I share, stories I tell and if it’s still okay that I do so. But in the end, I typically always conclude that yes -> it’s perfectly okay. In fact, if I could only tell you how many people said things like, “Thank you for sharing…..it made me…“
6. Inclusion. I noticed something while we were home that I had wondered about. In California, we have nudged here and there trying to find our place. Back in Minnesota, we don’t have to try. Instead, we are included everywhere. The kids (both friends and family, neither of which know Samarah or Isaiah very well) were kind and 100% inclusive of our kids. I watched at every single function to see how interactions played out. Not only were they cordial and inclusive, but loving, so loving. 
7. Midwest nice. Yeah. It’s a real thing. Did I ever tell you that when Ryan and I went on our first date he tried opening his truck door for me? I didn’t even know that was a thing anymore. But people around here do that sort of thing all the time. They also say “hello” to strangers, and don’t think twice about helping someone, anyone, in need out. You can say that happens everywhere, and on some level it might, but it’s nothing like here.
8. Mama Tribe. We took a few hours while home, my best friends and I and got our kid’s together at my friend Meg’s parent’s house. There were so many children and babies there, and what I learned was that some things never change, and they are the Mama Tribe I’ve been wishing for on a consistent basis. In fact, what was bizarre is that we didn’t even have the chance to get a lot of talking in….you know, chasing around the kids, making sure they were fed, happy and dry. And even still, I felt like we belonged in ways I’m not sure I ever had with a Mama Tribe. 
9. Space. I’ve been talking a lot about space lately, space on several levels. There is plenty of space in Minnesota. The roads are less crowded, homes are not built on top of each other in the same way as California and everything is just a little bit slower paced. I have been craving this space.
10. The Midwest is smart. I realize that the political season brings out the worst in most, but I think one of my biggest pet peeves is when I hear people say, “Well XYZ will win for sure because of all the misinformed and unintelligent people in the Midwest.” This could not be any further from the truth. People in the Midwest are smart, and the intelligence factor from San Francisco to Minneapolis is not all that different.
11. You’ll always need your mama. I spent a lot of time with my mom while at home. Yesterday, on our last day in Minnesota, she and I went shopping at Urban Finds in Medford. A short-lived shopping trip, but it left me with the undeniable feeling that I am my Mama. And also, I will always need my mama. She sure does love our babies, she thinks Isaiah is just a hoot and carries on a conversation with Samarah like old friends. p.s. If you’re from Minnesota, but don’t’ live there, next time you’re home, stop into Urban Finds and grab you this shirt. I did. Love. 
12. You will miss your home. “If you go anywhere, even paradise, you will miss your home.” I posted THIS on Instagram recently, and I can’t even tell you how real that is. In so many ways, California has been my paradise. But I have missed the real home. 
13. The real home. On January 13, 2015, I wrote Feels Like Home. I re-read this post a few times. I wanted to understand whether or not I truly believe that. I concluded that I don’t. I concluded that that lump in my throat has never truly left the building. There is a difference between regret and a deep down, gut-wrenching feeling. I have never, and I will never, regret our time in California. But it only felt like home because I had Ryan, then Samarah and now Isaiah with me. My whole world under one roof. And had Ryan and I never ventured out West, we would have never arrived at a place where it felt like home. But at the end of that post, I stated, “California is not Minnesota. It never has been; it never will be.” This is because Minnesota is the real home.
14. A year is too long. Before this past trip, I had not been home in a year. We likely won’t be able to go this next Christmas either, and so it could be another year before I’m home again. The hardest part about a year for me is that it means I won’t see my dad for another year. If you know him, you get it, but making it out to California has not been a reality since Samarah was born. It kills me a little inside. But….
15. We will be back for good. While California is amazing (so many more pros than cons for living there), the cons have now outweighed the pros. The calling to return home gets stronger by the day. I don’t know when or where or how, but staying in California forever is not an option.

There is no place like home.

Really, there is no place like the homeskillet Minnesota.

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Xox,
SKH

Sarah Kay Hoffman

You will heal. I will help.